The two most important days in your life

My daughter Charlotte asked me who my favorite baseball player in the Hall of Fame was--and, after explaining that none of the current or recent New York Mets were in the Hall--I told her my favorite was Jackie Robinson. I chose Jackie not because of the ball player he was, though obviously he was an excellent one. I chose Jackie for the person he was, and for the influence he had on others, and on the world.

Jackie Robinson said: "A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives."

Mark Twain said: "The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why."

These are two of the most powerful quotes I've ever read, and I try to live by both every day. I believe I was born to help build a more "likeable" world for my children, my family, and those who I affect through my writing, speaking, teaching, and leading. I believe I was born to help my children and others become more transparent, authentic leaders who put others' needs first.

-- Dave Kerpen, Inc., 7/8/13 (also Super Quiz, 9/18/20)

a learning opportunity

The real destroyer of our peace of mind isn’t an external weapon or enemy, but our own destructive emotions. Neither our friends nor even the Buddha provide an opportunity to practice patience in the way that a hostile person does. And in so doing, an enemy can become our teacher.

Dalai Lama, 8/20/20

55 quotes used by Steve Cohen

“Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind” – attributed to Dr. Seuss and FDR presidential advisor Bernard Baruch

“There’s no right way to do the wrong thing” – Unknown.

“If you don’t ask, the answer’s always no” – Pat Croce

“I can play the music, but I can’t make everybody dance.”

“I like to read the actual papers because you see stuff you’re not looking for. “ Mayor Bloomberg

“Most people are going to swear by you, some are going to swear at you.” – Steve’s dad

“Be more concerned with your character than what you’re doing.” – John Wooden

“The gum was losing its flavor.” – Steve Cohen (original)

He said this in response to when I asked, “Why did you want to get into TV?”

“I’m a diamond, I’m forever.”

Steve talking about why he keeps up with people

“I’m not a crook.” – Richard Nixon

Steve referenced this quote when he did air quotes. It’s important to always be skeptical of our leaders.

“Insecure people reinvent themselves and secure people evolve.” – Madonna

And then Steve says, “Which isn’t meant to be a diss to the author of ‘Reinvent Yourself’”

“Insecure people network and secure people offer their friendship.” – Steve Cohen (original)

“What’s the world’s largest microphone? A telephone.” – Steve says this is “an old saying”. But pick up the phone and call people.

“The slightest good deed is better than the greatest intentions.” – John Wooden (basketball coach who Steve says is a great influence on him)

“Do it anyway.” – Mother Teresa

Matt Lauer once said he got 6 Christmas cards when he worked in local TV and the next year he got 200.

“You don’t just want something read, you want it spread.” – Unknown. The difference between a good podcast and a viral podcast.

“Something remarkable is just that. It’s Re- Mark-able.” – Seth Godin. (How to get something spread).

“There’s a difference between excellent and remarkable.” – Seth Godin?

“The details separate the good from the great.” – Unknown/Steve Cohen (original)

“We have the best ingredients. We have the best food.” – Wolfgang Puck

“Things work out best for those who make the best of the way things work out.” – John Wooden

“No matter what happens, I say, ‘Good.’ I broke my leg. Good. I can use the other leg.” – Jocko Willink

“There’s no right way to do the wrong thing.” – LA County Jail quote in a documentary about the bloods and the crips

“That’s why I’m here” – James Taylor

“I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times.” – Bruce Lee

“If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.” – From the movie Dodgeball

“If you’re dreams aren’t bigger than yourself, you’re not dreaming big enough.” – Ava DuVernay

“Good news is never late” – Steve Cohen (original)

“Never let a temporary inconvenience get in the way of permanent improvement.” – Unknown.

“If I’m going after Moby Dick, I bring tartar sauce.” – Steve Cohen (original)

Talking about going after big name guests

“Take a chance, Columbus took a chance” – Steve Cohen (original)

“All leaders deal with hope.” – James Carville

“Hope breeds peace.” – Confucius

“I really enjoy when people stop me and they say I’ve helped them and I really inspired them.” – James Altucher

Steve remembering when he met me

“There’s no such thing as a slow newsday only lazy reporters.” – Steve Cohen (original)

“You have to make what’s important interesting.” – Steve Cohen (original)

“Let’s get ready to rumble.” – Michael Buffer

“Life’s a marathon, not a sprint.” – Dr. Phil

“How do you get people to a party? Invite them early. Invite them often. Be a good host.” – Steve Cohen (original)

“A stitch in time saves nine” – Unknown

“Those who know you best should love you most.” Steve Cohen (original ?)

“When I got three rejections, I said, ‘Oh great, only 96 more to go.’” – Seth Godin

“If you don’t have time to do it right the first time, when do you have time to do it over again?” – John Wooden

“Champions do everyday what losers do only occasionally” – Mike Tyson

“Everyone’s got a plan until you get punched in the face.” – Mike Tyson

“Successful people focus on the flowers and not the weeds.” – Denis Waitley, author of The Psychology of Winning

“You got to get along to go along.” & “Persistence beats resistance”

Talking about dealing with hostility at work

“Try harder” – Avis

“I’m not new to this. I’m true to this.” – Unknown

“I’d rather tame a wild horse than motivate a mule.” – Unknown / Steve Cohen original

“When Siegfried and Roy were attacked, everybody was like, ‘That tiger went crazy.’ That tiger didn’t go crazy. That tiger went tiger.” – Chris Rock

“Be a no limit person.” – Wayne Dyer

“People want to be around people who are positive. People want to be around people who praise you. People want to be around people who look for the best in other people.” – Richard Branson

-- James Altucher, 5/21/18

That's Life!

as explained by Calvin and Hobbes (or Calvin and Susie)

when everything seems to be going wrong

You know great things are coming when everything seems to be going wrong.  Old energy is clearing out for new energy to enter.  Be patient!

-- Idil Ahmed

Looking behind

Looking behind, I am filled with gratitude.

Looking forward, I am filled with vision.

Looking upwards, I am filled with strength.

Looking within, I discover peace.

Apache prayer

change one word

As adults, we spend a lot of time talking about all of the things that we have to do.

You have to wake up early for work. You have to make another sales call for your business. You have to work out today. You have to write an article. You have to make dinner for your family. You have to go to your son’s game.

Now, imagine changing just one word in the sentences above.

You don’t “have” to. You “get” to.

You get to wake up early for work. You get to make another sales call for your business. You get to cook dinner for your family. By simply changing one word, you shift the way you view each event. You transition from seeing these behaviors as burdens and turn them into opportunities.

The key point is that both versions of reality are true. You have to do those things, and you also get to do them. We can find evidence for whatever mind-set we choose.

I once heard a story about a man who uses a wheelchair. When asked if it was difficult being confined, he responded, “I’m not confined to my wheelchair—I am liberated by it. If it wasn’t for my wheelchair, I would be bed-bound and never able to leave my house.”1 This shift in perspective completely transformed how he lived each day.

I think it’s important to remind yourself that the things you do each day are not burdens, they are opportunities. So often, the things we view as work are actually the reward.

Embrace your constraints. Fall in love with boredom. Do the work.

You don’t have to. You get to.

-- James Clear / This article is an excerpt from Chapter 10 of my New York Times bestselling book Atomic Habits. Read more here. 

Every day

Handle things with gentleness, optimism

1. Every day is a blessing from God. Do not waste it. Do something positive; not just for yourself but for others, too.

2. Love is the glue that keeps a relationship together. If it is removed, the relationship starts falling apart.

3. Kindness is a gift we all possess. It becomes powerful when we use it.

4. Always handle things with gentleness. This way, fragile things like friendships won’t be damaged or broken.

5. Anger is a human reaction. It usually happens when we don’t have our way.

6. Forgiveness is a godly trait. It shows grace, mercy, and compassion.

7. We all make mistakes. This is how we learn.

8. Look ahead to life with optimism. Do not dwell in the past, but learn from it.

Clarence Chun

Kalihi

-- Star Advertiser, 12/23/18

Quotations

Provide the one word missing from the quotation. (e.g., “I came, I saw, I ____.” Answer: Conquered (Julius Caesar).)

FRESHMAN LEVEL

1. “That which does not kill us makes us _____.”

2. “It does not matter how slowly you go, so long as you do not ____.”

3. “If you’re going through ____, keep going.”

4. "Don't cry because it's over, ____ because it happened."

5. "You only live once, but if you do it ____, once is enough."

GRADUATE LEVEL

6. “The _____ life is not worth living.”

7. "When you cease to ____, you cease to live."

8. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t ____.”

9. "No one can make you fell inferior without your ____"

10. "I find that the harder I work, the more ____ I seem to have."

PH.D. LEVEL

11. “It is really clear that the most precious resource we all have is ____.”

12. “The secret of getting ahead is getting ____.”

13. “_____ is what happens while you are busy making other plans.”

14. "Imagination is more important than _____."

15.  All our _____ can come true if we have the courage to pursue them."

-- Star Advertiser, August 18, 2018

sit still for a moment

There’s a practice so simple that many people will discount it as not worthy of trying.

They’ll miss out on the transformative power of that very simplicity.

The practice is this: Sit still for a moment, and just feel what it feels like to be alive. Then relax into that feeling.

Yes, I know, sitting still for a moment isn’t something we want to do right now. We got things to do, man! But just try it, for a minute. Sit still and feel what it feels like to be alive, for you, right this moment. There’s never been another moment like this particular one, and never will be again.

slow and steady

The hard part is "steady."

Anyone can go slow. It takes a special kind of commitment to do it steadily, drip after drip, until you get to where you're going.

-- Seth Godin, 12/17/17

little steps

There is no one giant step that does it. It's a lot of little steps. - Peter A. Cohen

the secret to a happy life

from Earl

small actions

Small, deliberate actions inspired by your true desires create a life you love.

[via twitter]

Zen Things

1.  Do one thing at a time

[via facebook]

[12/6/15]  Roy posts it again.  Apparently the original article is from Leo Babauta.  Here's a derivative article (maybe it's from Babauta too).

good judgment

Good judgment comes from experience, and experience - -well, that comes from poor judgment. - Cousin Woodman

-- Motivational Quotes (via twitter)

true power

Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength, mastering yourself is true power. - Lao-Tzu

you don't say

You always win by not saying the things you don't need to say. - Chinese Proverb

[via twitter]

saying no

Your capacity to say No determines your capacity to say Yes to greater things. - Stanley Jones

[via twitter]

humanity

The Dalai Lama, when asked what surprised him most about humanity, answered, ‘Man. Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health. And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived.

Something toponderon, even though it's a fake.

a beautiful day

"A beautiful day begins with a beautiful mindset. When you wake up, take a second to think about what a privilege it is to simply be alive and healthy. The moment you start acting like life is a blessing, I assure you it will start to feel like one."

[via roy]

It's All In Your Mind

Whatever you hold in your mind will tend to occur in your life. If you continue to believe as you have always believed, you will continue to act as you have always acted. If you continue to act as you have always acted, you will continue to get what you have always gotten. If you want different results in your life or your work, all you have to do is change your mind.

[via facebook]

the path

“There is no path to happiness: happiness is the path.”

― Gautama Buddha (or not)

[via facebook]

the strongest people

“The strongest people aren’t always the people who win, but the people who don’t give up when they lose”

[via facebook]

was it said by Liam Payne or Ashley Hodgeson?  (probably the former was quoting the latter)

admiration

“When I was young, I used to admire intelligent people; as I grow older, I admire kind people.”

-- Abraham Joshua Heschel [via facebook]

the best kind of people

The best kind of people are the ones that come into your life , and make you see the sun where you once saw clouds.The people that believe in you so much , you start to believe in you too. The people that love you, simply for being you.The once in a lifetime kind of people.

-- via facebook

Observe, Observe, Observe

Observe others and learn, observe nature and learn but, above all, observe self and learn, for this is one of the main keys to spiritual perfection.

-- Ian Gardner [via facebook]

life is simple

"Life is really simple but we insist on making it complicated"
Confucius

[via facebook]

just breathe

Sometimes the best thing you can do is not think, not wonder, not imagine, not obsess. Just breathe, and have faith that everything will work out for the best.

[via facebook]

patience

Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.

-- Joyce Meyer, Spiritual Inspiration (via facebook)

Lao Tzu

ten quotes

“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power. If you realize that you have enough, you are truly rich.”

“I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures.”

“If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.”

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”

“Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.”

[there's five more, but don't be in a hurry to read them..]

[via roy on facebook]

Two things

Two Things to Remember in Life : Take care of your thoughts when you are alone, and Take care of your words when you are with people.

The Noticer

Then one fateful day, things changed. We'd just picked my older daughter up from kindergarten and were getting out of the car. Not going fast enough for her liking, my older daughter said to her little sister, "You are so slow." And when she crossed her arms and let out an exasperated sigh, I saw myself -- and it was a gut-wrenching sight.

I was a bully who pushed and pressured and hurried a small child who simply wanted to enjoy life.

My eyes were opened; I saw with clarity the damage my hurried existence was doing to both of my children.

Although my voice trembled, I looked into my small child's eyes and said, "I am so sorry I have been making you hurry. I love that you take your time, and I want to be more like you."

Both my daughters looked equally surprised by my painful admission, but my younger daughter's face held the unmistakable glow of validation and acceptance.

"I promise to be more patient from now on," I said as I hugged my curly-haired child who was now beaming at her mother's newfound promise.

It was pretty easy to banish "hurry up" from my vocabulary. What was not so easy was acquiring the patience to wait on my leisurely child. To help us both, I began giving her a little more time to prepare if we had to go somewhere.

When my daughter and I took walks or went to the store, I allowed her to set the pace. And when she stopped to admire something, I would push thoughts of my agenda out of my head and simply observe her. I witnessed expressions on her face that I'd never seen before. I studied dimples on her hands and the way her eyes crinkled up when she smiled. I saw the way other people responded to her stopping to take time to talk to them. I saw the way she spotted the interesting bugs and pretty flowers. She was a Noticer, and I quickly learned that The Noticers of the world are rare and beautiful gifts. That's when I finally realized she was a gift to my frenzied soul.

My promise to slow down was made almost three years ago, at the same time I began my journey to let go of daily distraction and grasp what matters in life. And living at a slower pace still takes a concerted effort. My younger daughter is my living reminder of why I must keep trying. In fact, the other day, she reminded me once again.

The two of us had taken a bike ride to a sno-cone shack while on vacation. After purchasing a cool treat for my daughter, she sat down at a picnic table delightedly admiring the icy tower she held in her hand.

Suddenly a look of worry came across her face. "Do I have to rush, Mama?"

I could have cried. Perhaps the scars of a hurried life don't ever completely disappear, I thought sadly.

As my child looked up at me waiting to know if she could take her time, I knew I had a choice. I could sit there in sorrow thinking about the number of times I rushed my child through life... or I could celebrate the fact that today I'm trying to do thing differently.

I chose to live in today.

"You don't have to rush. Just take your time," I said gently. Her whole face instantly brightened and her shoulders relaxed.

And so we sat side-by-side talking about things that ukulele-playing-6-year-olds talk about. There were even moments when we sat in silence just smiling at each other and admiring the sights and sounds around us.

I thought my child was going to eat the whole darn thing -- but when she got to the last bite, she held out a spoonful of ice crystals and sweet juice for me. "I saved the last bite for you, Mama," my daughter said proudly.

As I let the icy goodness quench my thirst, I realized I just got the deal of a lifetime.

I gave my child a little time... and in return, she gave me her last bite and reminded me that things taste sweeter and love comes easier when you stop rushing through life.

-- via Maile

slow progress?

 “Be not afraid of making slow progress, be only afraid of standing still.” - Chinese Proverb

-- via Life Coach Jay

the virtue of man

The great virtue of man lies in his ability to correct his mistakes and continually make a new man of himself -- Wang Yang Ming

- David W. Fuller, Costco Connection, January 2013, page 9

Also:

Think of the beauty still left around you and be happy -- Anne Frank

Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle -- Plato

watering your grass

-- via roy

rough day?

via lessons learned in life via roy

wuabg

 

via roy

what we think

we become

-- the Buddha

Didn't know the Buddha said this.

So did James Allen, kind of.

BTW, this is The Secret (more or less).

what to look for

via Roy

three questions

From this fool.com article comes George Kinder's three questions about life planning.

Kinder poses three questions:

1. Imagine you are financially secure, that you have enough money to take care of your needs, now and in the future. How would you live your life? Would you change anything? Let yourself go. Don’t hold back on your dreams. Describe a life that is complete and richly yours.
2. Now imagine that you visit your doctor, who tells you that you have only 5-10 years to live. You won’t ever feel sick, but you will have no notice of the moment of your death. What will you do in the time you have remaining? Will you change your life and how will you do it? (Note that this question does not assume unlimited funds.)
3. Finally, imagine that your doctor shocks you with the news that you only have 24 hours to live. Notice what feelings arise as you confront your very real mortality. Ask yourself: What did you miss? Who did you not get to be? What did you not get to do?

Kinder says that answering the first question is easy. There are lots of things we’d do if money were no object. But as the questions progress, there’s a sort of funnel. They become more difficult to answer, and there are fewer possible responses. Life planning is all about answering the third question.

all i need is some reasons

When was the last time you heard something that made you change your mind on a particular topic?

Maybe it was after coming across a new fact, or hearing a cogent argument that gave you new insight, or maybe just your own reconsideration of what you know. Or maybe you don’t seek new information or points of view, but affirmation of what you already believe.

That was the gist of a discussion on a recent NPR Saturday morning show. Unfortunately, I only caught part of the show while driving, and can’t recall the show or host (lost in the blur of the daughter’s wedding day), but the basic premise has stuck with me, and I’ve been thinking about how I come to beliefs and opinions.

Perhaps because I’m an independent (lower-case i) and have views that could be called conservative on some issues and liberal on others, I tend to seek out new ideas and facts, many of which end up challenging my views. I always appreciate a smart argument with strong and honest facts. In this it helps to not be tied to any ideology.

Or, as I say of political talking heads on radio and TV, whether conservative or liberal: I’d hate to wake up every day knowing already what I think before the question has been asked.

Or as James Young has said (with tongue firmly in cheek): “Now that my mind is made up, all I need are some reasons.”

-- Don Chapman, Midweek, 8/22/12

5 things

really smart people do.


Most people don't really think much about how they learn. Generally you assume learning comes naturally. You listen to someone speak either in conversation or in a lecture and you simply absorb what they are saying, right? Not really. In fact, I find as I get older that real learning takes more work. The more I fill my brain with facts, figures, and experience, the less room I have for new ideas and new thoughts. Plus, now I have all sorts of opinions that may refute the ideas being pushed at me. Like many people I consider myself a lifelong learner, but more and more I have to work hard to stay open minded.

But the need for learning never ends, so your desire to do so should always outweigh your desire to be right. The world is changing and new ideas pop up everyday; incorporating them into your life will keep you engaged and relevant. The following are the methods I use to stay open and impressionable.

Buddhist quotes

[via Roy]

the prime purpose

Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them. - Dalai Lama

life is simple

[via roy]

40 things to say before you die

Before you’re sprawled on your deathbed, there are some things you really have to say. They’re not complicated. They’re not poetry.

They’re just short sentences with big meaning.

I hope they get you talking.

40 “I wonder.”

belief

Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it. ~Buddha [via roy]

Kind of reminds me of the Bruce Lee article Liberate Yourself (it's very possible that's where he got it from)

***

[10/5/11] And maybe Steve Jobs got this from Buddha too.

“Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” ~ Steve Jobs ~

optimism

On my way home one day, I stopped to watch a Little League baseball game that was being played in a park near my home.

As I sat down behind the bench on the first-base line, I asked one of the boys what the score was

'We're behind 14 to nothing,' he answered with a smile.

'Really,' I said. 'I have to say you don't look very discouraged.'

'Discouraged?', the boy asked with a Puzzled look on his face... 'Why should we be discouraged? We haven't been up to bat yet.'

[via SY79@chucks_angels]

The Quiet Man

Carl was a quiet man. He didn't talk much. He would always greet you with a big smile and a firm handshake. Even after living in our neighborhood for over 50 years, no one could really say they knew him very well.

Before his retirement, he took the bus to work each morning. The lone sight of him walking down the street often worried us. He had a slight limp from a bullet wound received in World War II. Watching him, we worried that although he had survived the war, he may not make it through our changing uptown neighborhood with its ever-increasing random violence, gangs, and drug activity.

When he saw the flier at our local church asking for volunteers for caring for the gardens behind the minister's residence, he responded in his characteristically unassuming manner. Without fanfare, he just signed up.

He was well into his 87th year when the very thing we had always feared finally happened. He was just finishing his watering for the day when three gang members approached him. Ignoring their attempt to intimidate him, he simply asked, "Would you like a drink from the hose?" The tallest and toughest-looking of the three said, "Yeah, sure," with a malevolent little smile. As Carl offered the hose to him, the other two grabbed Carl's arm, throwing him down. As the hose snaked crazily over the ground, dousing everything in its way, Carl's assailants stole his retirement watch and his wallet, and then fled.

Carl tried to get himself up, but he had been thrown down on his bad leg. He lay there trying to gather himself as the minister came running to help him. Although the minister had witnessed the attack from his window, he couldn't get there fast enough to stop it. "Carl, are you okay? Are you hurt?" the minister kept asking as he helped Carl to his feet. Carl just passed a hand over his brow and sighed, shaking his head.

"Just some punk kids. I hope they'll wise up someday." His wet clothes clung to his slight frame as he bent to pick up the hose. He adjusted the nozzle again and started to water.

Confused and a little concerned, the minister asked, "Carl, what are you doing?"

"I've got to finish my watering. It's been very dry lately," came the calm reply.

Satisfying himself that Carl really was all right, the minister could only marvel. Carl was a man from a different time and place.

A few weeks later the three returned. Just as before their threat was unchallenged. Carl again offered them a drink from his hose. This time they didn't rob him. They wrenched the hose from his hand and drenched him head to foot in the icy water. When they had finished their humiliation of him, they sauntered off down the street, throwing catcalls and curses, falling over one another laughing at the hilarity of what they had just done.

Carl just watched them. Then he turned toward the warmth giving sun, picked up his hose, and went on with his watering. The summer was quickly fading into fall. Carl was doing some tilling when he was startled by the sudden approach of someone behind him.

He stumbled and fell into some evergreen branches As he struggled to regain his footing, he turned to see the tall leader of his summer tormentors reaching down for him. He braced himself for the expected attack.

"Don't worry old man, I'm not gonna hurt you this time." The young man spoke softly, still offering the tattooed and scarred hand to Carl. As he helped Carl get up, the man pulled a crumpled bag from his pocket and handed it to Carl.

"What's this?" Carl asked.

"It's your stuff," the man explained. "It's your stuff back. Even the money in your wallet."

"I don't understand," Carl said. "Why would you help me now?"

The man shifted his feet, seeming embarrassed and ill at ease. "I learned something from you," he said. "I ran with that gang and hurt people like you. We picked you because you were old and we knew we could do it. But every time we came and did something to you, instead of yelling and fighting back, you tried to give us a drink. You didn't hate us for hating you. You kept showing love against our hate." He stopped for a moment "I couldn't sleep after we stole your stuff, so here it is back." He paused for another awkward moment, not knowing what more there was to say. "That bag's my way of saying thanks for straightening me out, I guess." And with that, he walked off down the street.

Carl looked down at the sack in his hands and gingerly opened it. He took out his retirement watch and put it back on his wrist. Opening his wallet, he checked for his wedding photo. He gazed for a moment at the young bride that still smiled back at him from all those years ago.

He died one cold day after Christmas that winter. Many people attended his funeral in spite of the weather. In particular the minister noticed a tall young man that he didn't know sitting quietly in a distant corner of the church.

The minister spoke of Carl's garden as a lesson in life. In a voice made thick with unshed tears, he said, "Do your best and make your garden as beautiful as you can. We will never forget Carl and his garden."

The following spring another flier went up. It read: "Person needed to care for Carl's garden." The flier went unnoticed by the busy parishioners until one day when a knock was heard at the minister's office door. Opening the door, the minister saw a pair of scarred and tattooed hands holding the flier. "I believe this is my job, if you'll have me," the young man said.

The minister recognized him as the same young man who had returned the stolen watch and wallet to Carl. He knew that Carl's kindness had turned this man's life around. As the minister handed him the keys to the garden shed, he said, "Yes, go take care of Carl's garden and honor him."

The man went to work and, over the next several years, he tended the flowers and vegetables just as Carl had done. In that time, he went to college, got married, and became a prominent member of the community. But he never forgot his promise to Carl's memory and kept the garden as beautiful as he thought Carl would have kept it.

One day he approached the new minister and told him that he couldn't care for the garden any longer. He explained with a shy and happy smile, "My wife just had a baby boy last night, and she's bringing him home on Saturday."

"Well, congratulations!" said the minister, as he was handed the garden shed keys. "That's wonderful! What's the baby's name?"

"Carl," he replied.

[forwarded by Raynette from Phyllis]

A beautiful message about growing old

A beautiful message about growing old

heaven and hell

Holy man was having a conversation with the Lord one day and said, 'Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like.'

The Lord led the holy man to two doors. He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in.

In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew, which smelled delicious and made the holy man's mouth water. The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful. But because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths. The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering.

The Lord said, 'You have seen Hell.

They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one. There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man's mouth water. The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking. The holy man said, 'I don't understand. 'It is simple,' said the Lord. 'It requires but one skill.

You see, they have learned to feed each other.

[via Donna]

Rich or Poor?

One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.

They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.

On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"

"It was great, Dad."

"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.

"Oh yeah," said the son.

"So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.

The son answered:

"I saw that we have one dog and they had four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.

We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight. We have servants who serve us, but they serve others. We buy our food, but they grow theirs. We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them."

The boy's father was speechless.

Then his son added, "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."

who will sit in that chair?

I have visited Japan many times on invitation. Once while giving a religious discourse there, I wanted to test the quality of the audience. I said to them, "Please consider a living room which has only one chair in it. Now let us suppose that Sri Krishna, Lord Buddha, Jesus Christ and Prophet Muhammad have entered that living room together. Please tell me who among them will sit in that chair."

One lady stood up and said, "The chair will remain empty because, I am sure, each of those prophets will offer the chair to others."

Her answer was correct because all saints and prophets are humble.

Rules of Life

RULES OF LIFE

Complete the rule with one word.

(e.g., The road to hell is paved with good ___. Answer: Intentions.)

FRESHMAN LEVEL

1. He who can, does. He who cannot, ___.

Answer________

2. Never mistake personality for ___.

Answer________

3. In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of ___.

Answer________

GRADUATE LEVEL

4. No one can make you feel inferior without your ___.

Answer________

5. When you cease to make a contribution, you begin to ___.

Answer________

6. Most men never mature; they simply grow ___.

Answer________

PH.D. LEVEL

7. When in charge, ponder; when in trouble, delegate; when in doubt, ___.

Answer________

8. A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of ___.

Answer________

9. Never invest your money in anything that eats or needs ___.

Answer________

ANSWERS

Observations from Andy Rooney

Please Read all the way to the bottom: If you will take the time to read these. I promise you'll come away with an enlightened perspective. The subjects covered affect us all on a daily basis:

They're written by Andy Rooney , a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words. Enjoy.......

I've learned..... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I've learned..... That when you're in love, it shows.

I've learned..... That just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.

I've learned..... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned..... That being kind is more important than being right.

I've learned..... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I've learned..... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.

I've learned..... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I've learned..... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I've learned..... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I've learned..... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned..... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned..... That money doesn't buy class.

I've learned..... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I've learned.... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned..... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I've learned..... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned...... That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I've learned..... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I've learned..... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I've learned.... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.

I've learned..... That opportunities are never lost, someone will take the ones you miss.

I've learned..... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I've learned..... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.

I've learned..... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned..... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I've learned..... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.

I've learned..... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occur while you're climbing it.

I've learned ..... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

[email forward via Raynette]

* * *

Thoughtful lessons, though it actually wasn't written by Andy Rooney, but largely taken from the book Live and Learn and Pass It On.

Instructions for Life

1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
   
2. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
   
3. Follow the three Rs:
   Respect for self
   Respect for others and
   Responsibility for all your actions.
   
4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
   
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
   
6. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
   
7. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
   
8. Spend some time alone every day.
   
9. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
   
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
    
11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.
    
12. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.
    
13. Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
    
14. Be gentle with the earth.
    
15. Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
    
16. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
    
17. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
    
18. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

This is from a chain letter supposedly written by the Dalai Lama. As might be expected, it's not from him, but is actually from Life's Little Instruction Book. But good thoughts nonetheless.

From: You Know Who

Date: Eternity
To: My Children On Earth
Re: Idiotic Religious Rivalries and Non-sense


My Dear Children (and believe me, that's all of you),

I consider myself a pretty patient Guy. I mean, look at the Grand Canyon.

It took millions of years to get it right. And how about evolution? Boy,
nothing is slower than designing that whole Darwinian thing to take place, cell by cell and gene by gene. I've even been patient through your fashions, civilizations, wars and schemes, and the countless ways you take Me for granted until you get yourselves into big trouble again and again.

But today, I want to let you know about some things that are starting to
tick Me off.

First of all, your religious rivalries are driving Me up a wall. Enough
already! Let's get one thing straight: These are your religions, not Mine.
I'm the Whole Enchilada; I'm beyond them all. Every one of your religions
claims there's only one of Me. But in the very next breath, each religion
claims it's My favorite one. And each claims its bible was written
personally by me, and that all the other bibles are man-made. Oh, Me. How do I even begin to put a stop to such complicated nonsense?

Okay, listen up now: I'm your Father and Mother, and I don't play favorites among My Children. Also, I hate to break it to you, but I didn't write that stuff. I've always been more of a "doer" anyway. So all your books, including the bibles, were written by men and women. They were inspired, remarkable people, but they also made mistakes here and there. I made sure of that, so that you would never trust a written word more than your own living Heart.

You see, one Human Being to me -- even a Bum on the street -- is worth more than all the holy books in the world. That's just the kind of Guy I Am.

My Spirit is not an historical thing, It's alive right here, right now, as fresh as your next breath. Holy books and religious rites are sacred and
powerful, but not more so than the least of You. They were only meant to
steer you in the right direction, not to keep you arguing with each other,
and certainly not to keep you from trusting your own personal connection with Me.

Which brings Me to My next point about your nonsense: You act like I need you and your religions to stick up for Me or "win souls" for My Sake. Please, don't do Me any favors. I can stand quite well on my own, thank you. I don't need you to defend Me, and I don't need constant credit. I just want you to be good to each other.

And another thing: I don't get all worked up over money or politics, so stop dragging My name into your dramas. For example, I swear to Me that I never threatened Oral Roberts. I never rode in any of Rajneesh's Rolls Royces. I never told Pat Robertson to run for president, and I've never ever had a conversation with Jim Bakker, Jerry Falwell, or Jimmy Swaggart! Of course, come Judgment Day, I certainly intend to...

The thing is, I want you to stop thinking of religion as some sort of loyalty pledge to Me. The true purpose of your religions is so that you can become more aware of Me, not the other way around. Believe Me, I know you already. I know what's in each of your hearts, and I love you with no strings attached. Lighten up and enjoy Me. That's what religion is best for.

What you seem to forget is how mysterious I Am. You look at the petty little differences in your scriptures and say, "Well, if this is the Truth, then that can't be!" But instead of trying to figure out My Paradoxes and Unfathomable Nature -- which, by the way, you never will -- why not open your hearts to the simple common threads in every religion?

You know what I'm talking about:

a.. Love and respect everyone.
b.. Be kind. Even when life is scary or confusing, take courage and be of
good cheer, for I Am always with you.
c.. Learn how to be quiet, so you can hear My Still, Small Voice (I don't
like to shout).
d.. Leave the world a better place by living your life with dignity and
gracefulness, for you are My Own Child.
e.. Hold back nothing from life, for the parts of you that can die will
surely die, and the parts that can't, won't.
f.. So don't worry, be happy (I stole that last line from Bobby McFerrin,
but he stole it from Meher Baba in the first place.)

Simple stuff. Why do you keep making it so complicated? It's like you're
always looking for an excuse to be upset. And I'm very tired of being your main excuse. Do you think I care whether you call me Yahweh, Jehovah, Allah, Wakantonka, Brahma, Father, Mother, or even The Void or Nirvana?

Do you think I care which of My Special Children you feel closest to -- Moses, Jesus, Mary, Buddha, Krishna, Mohammed or any of the others? You can call Me and My Special Ones any name you choose, if only you would go about My business of loving one another as I love you. How can you keep neglecting something so simple?

I'm not telling you to abandon your religions. Enjoy your religions, honor
them, learn from them, just as you should enjoy, honor, and learn from your parents. But do you walk around telling everyone that your parents are better than theirs? Your religion, like your parents, may always have the most special place in your heart; I don't mind that at all. And I don't want you to combine all the Great Traditions into One Big Mess. Each religion is unique for a reason. Each has a unique style so that people can find the best path for themselves.

But My Special Children -- the ones your religions revolve around -- all
live in the same place (My Heart) and they get along perfectly, I assure
you. The clergy must stop creating a myth of sibling rivalry where there is none.

My Blessed Children of Earth, the world has grown too small for your pervasive religious bigotry and confusion. The whole planet is connected by air travel, satellite dishes, telephones, fax machines, rock concerts, diseases, and mutual needs and concerns. Get with the program! If you really want to help Me celebrate life, commit yourselves to figuring out how to feed your hungry, clothe your naked, protect your abused, bring the soldiers home from this nonsense war and shelter your poor. And just as importantly, make your own everyday life a shining example of kindness and good humor. I've given you all the resources you need, if only you abandon your fear of each other and begin living, loving, and laughing together.

Finally, I'm not really ticked off, I just wanted to grab your attention because I hate to see you suffer. But I gave you Free Will, so what can I do now other than to try to influence you through reason, persuasion, and a little old-fashioned guilt and manipulation? After all, I Am the original Jewish Mother. I just want you to be happy, and I'll sit in The Dark. I really Am, indeed, I swear, with you always. Always. Trust In Me.

Your One and Only,

You Know Who

[via Herbert Gordon @ TheGreatSecret]

Bulding Bridges

Two Brothers
By: Author Unknown

Once upon a time two brothers, who lived on adjoining farms, fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in 40 years of farming side by side, sharing machinery, and trading labor and goods as needed without a conflict. Then the long collaboration fell apart. It began with a small misunderstanding and it grew into a major difference, and finally it exploded into an exchange of bitter words followed by weeks of silence.

One morning there was a knock on John's d oor. He opened it to find a man with a carpenter's tool box. "I'm looking for a few days' work" he said. "Perhaps you would have a few small jobs here and there I could help with? Could I help you?" "Yes," said the older brother. "I do have a job for you."

"Look across the creek at that farm. That's my neighbor; in fact, it's my younger brother. Last week there was a meadow between us and he took his bulldozer to the river levee and now there is a creek between us. Well, he may have done this to spite me, but I'll do him one better."

"See that pile of lumber by the barn? I want you to build me a fence -- an 8-foot fence -- so I won't need to see his place or his face anymore."

The carpenter said, "I think I understand the situation. Show me the nails and the post-hole digger and I'll be able to do a job that pleases you."

The older brother had to go to town, so he helped the carpenter get the materials ready and then he was off for the day. The carpenter worked hard all that day measuring, sawing, nailing. About sunset when the farmer returned, the carpenter had just finished his job.

The farmer's eyes opened wide, his jaw dropped. There was no fence there at all. It was a bridge -- a bridge stretching from one side of the creek to the other! A fine piece of work, handrails and all -- and the neighbor, his younger brother, was coming toward them, his hand outstretched. "You are quite a fellow to build this bridge after all I've said and done." The two brothers stood at each end of the bridge, and then they met in the middle, taking each other's hand.

They turned to see the carpenter hoist his toolbox onto his shoulder. "No, wait! Stay a few days. I've a lot of other projects for you," said the older brother. "I'd love to stay on," the carpenter said, but I have many more bridges to build.


As you work at building your business let this story by a reminder that you too want to build bridges with your associates rather they be affiliates, distributors or customers Build Bridges of friendship with them and your success will be guaranteed.

-- via Herbert Gordon, @TheGreatSecret

Fabulous Friday 50 Words of Wisdom

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
31. However good or bad a situation is - it will change.
32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
33. Believe in Miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
36. Growing old beats the alternative--dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
45. The best is yet to come.
46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
48. If you don't ask, you don't get.
49. Yield.
50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

[from Gwyn Walker Chambers via Herbert Gordon@thegreatsecret, 6/15/07]

who to hang out with

Be with people who make you want to be a better person in the world. Be with people whose very presence makes you aspire to be greater. The people I am talking about do not require that you want to rise. There is no sense of obligation. There is not even a request to you to expand your horizons. It is that simply by their presence, you feel something good, and you want more of it, and you want to be it. You want to be like these people who somehow, by their very being, increase your worth to yourself.

-- via Herbert Gordon@TheGreatSecret (free ebook)